Read for free with Kindle Unlimited
Surviving the System
Image
Reply
Cycling and Bouffants
A middle-aged woman speeding in a truck
Hogs the lane like she doesn’t give a @$#%
Cyclists beware
She cares more about her hair
Than running you over with her truck
Go Kenny! Scene 2 The Dry Run
Video
Kenny get’s ready to mix with the boys at his new home. First trip to the dinning hall. Go Kenny!
The Homeboy Shuffle
Video
Foster kid Kenny’s dance interpretation of arriving at his first boys home. Go Kenny!
National Action Figure Day
Video
Kenny promotes National Action Figure Day in an interview.
Be Nice to Your Waiter
In a room that smelled like aging meat
Chef Mutton Chop had too much to drink
He blurted out:
The guy who prepared your soup
never washes his hands after he poops!
Yes, tap water from the sink
is scary to drink.
They all put their dinkys
in the drinkys!
And their noodles
poke your strudel!
Always having fun
with your bun,
never forgetting the extra sleaze
on the cheese.
Hepatitis — Tag, You’re it!
Chef Mutton Chop then leaned over and vomited in a trash can.
And one final thought…
They always use the tortilla as a wipe
before they roll your burrito tight.
Cheers!
Have a great time as you dine tonight.
Celebrities Comment on 500 Followers
I’ll tell you who’s trapped — I was trapped during that post. You’re full of rubbish. You should be kicked off the internet.
Oh my gawd! And you call yourself a writer? Are you stupid? Chef Mutton Chop was the biggest load of crap I’ve ever read! They should kick you off the internet.
Ken, Ken, Ken. Airing your family’s dirty laundry on the internet. What are you thinking? I’m thinking you weren’t’ thinking. Have you considered changing your title from Potentially Disruptive to Surely Stupid?
Blog till you’re naked? What are you NSA’ing my mind? Stealing my ideas? Trying to take my mojo? You’re potentially gonna get your butt kicked if I find you rolling around in my head again!
You give the outdoors a bad name. You couldn’t navigate your way out of a kid’s cupcake party.
I’m with Mattie-boy on this one. Stay out of my head! Those are my voices! Mine alone…
*These statements are a pigmentation of my imagination. No actual celebrities were contacted for their opinion on my reaching 500 followers.
Potentially Disruptive thanks you for following! I always like to refer to myself in third-person.
Trapped
Yesterday I got trapped in a conversation about nothing,
And it went on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
Then I thought it was over
But it wasn’t
And it kept going on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
Then I thought it was over
But it wasn’t
So it went on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
I searched for an escape
But it kept going on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
Then I thought it was over
But it wasn’t
And it kept going on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
Then I thought it was over
But it wasn’t
And it kept going on
And on and on and on
And on and on and on
And I think it may still be going on…
Rappin’ Yogi Mossie
Yogi Mossie and the Down Dog Posse
We’re tearing hammies from here to Miami
We do our chaturangas in bling
We are the yoga kings
We’re always bringing the hassle
To the parkour lads in Newcastle
We’re always starting trouble
Here to burst your fitness bubble
The heat’s in the meat
As we breathe to the beat
Yogi Mossie and the Down Dog Posse are tough
Not to be confused with the cross fit fluff
Internet blogger freaks doing Blogarate
It’s like a Yugo drag racing a Maserati
You do push-ups on your pinkies
We do press-ups with our winkies
Yoga’s the winner
We’ll consume you for dinner
Warrior 1
Warrior2
Warrior 3
We practice yoga for free
Yogi Mossie and the Down Dog Posse
Namaste
Scammed
Granny’s looking for someone special to meet
Cruising the internet for a guy who’s sweet
Her husband died and now she feels like a loner
Over the net she met a Ukrainian mine owner
The picture of the man is tall dark and handsome
Not realizing her heart will be held for ransom
Granny really begins to care
He knows all the right words to share
He likes to instant message by choice
Granny never hears his voice
It’s a little odd he won’t use a phone
Then he instant messages Granny for a loan
He’s in big trouble… a situation far away
Granny loves him so she says “okay”
This situation goes on and on
Until all of Granny’s savings are gone
All those with grannies please beware
Scammers are everywhere
Stay close to your granny
Cheers
MARTENEY MEDIA 